Home Page | Alphabetic Index | Ratings Index | Web Resources

Can't Hardly Wait (1998)

No Real Hurry Here

A review by Michael S. Goldberger.
Copyright © Michael S. Goldberger 1999
Once upon a time, I sat with fellow Baby Boomers and discussed the relative merits of The Howdy Doody Show, a TV mainstay of our youth. One member of the chat group took us aback when he vehemently declared: "Clarabelle was an idiot." No matter that Clarabelle was the kiddy show's resident clown and, by virtue of that calling, was supposed to be an idiot. Doubtless, there must have been some unresolved issues at the root of this fierce intolerance.

The incident came to mind after experiencing the teeny-bopping, generation-rejoicing Can't Hardly Wait. Like Clarabelle, it is what it is. Its unpretentious celebration of the rites of spring is guaranteed manna for the high school class of 1998 and younger. But older folk who can't (or won't) relate its copycat merrymaking theme to their own salad days should spare themselves from its rampant egomania.

It is nightfall following high school graduation in the fictitious suburb of Huntington Hills. Party time! And the only thing that matters more than who's with who is who's hoping to be with who. The big buzz setting the mood for this rock-accompanied mating ritual is that top jock Mike and prom queen Amanda have called it Splitsville. Girl Whose Party It Is, as she is glibly referred to in the credits, has invited virtually the whole graduating class to the soiree. And for the purposes of no-brainer story exposition, practically everyone in attendance fits a ready stereotype.

First there's shy Preston (Ethan Embry), certainly too good for his own good, but obviously bright enough to get into Dartmouth per the yearbook-style introductory pics. He's been carrying a torch for the seemingly unapproachable Amanda (Jennifer Love Hewitt) ever since he sat next to her in freshman English, and tonight could be the night. Playing his lifelong Platonic pal/soul mate is Lauren Ambrose as Denise, the humorously caustic existentialist headed for NYU. Her identifying quote in the yearbook: "Your good friends stab you in the front."

Other recognisable types include: Charlie Korsmo as William, the nerd valedictorian who, for a lifetime of humiliation, has plotted revenge against narcissistic Mike (Peter Facinelli); and Setth Green as Kenny, the tom-fool white kid who features himself a homeboy.

Unlike American Graffiti, the intellectual granddaddy of this genre, Can't Hardly Wait is more concerned with when than why? Character motivations rarely venture past the hormonal level. In that respect, not only is it more akin to less pensive progenitors like Fast Times At Ridgemont High and The Breakfast Club, but it actually has more in common with the pre-social conscience "Beach Party" films of the early 1960s.

All that's missing in this latest permutation, co-written and directed by Deborah Kaplan and Harry Elfont, is the naughty innuendo. But who needs it? This contemporary paean to the sexual arrogance of youth is as candid as a PG-13 rating will allow. While the bald-faced honesty is somewhat liberating, parents who attend with their teens may have to suppress a wince or two.

Limiting the comedy to the house and grounds where the party is being held allows for condensed action in and around concentric circles of interest. Serving like subtitles, background music supports the silly doings with hardly subtle verve, whether identifying ebullience or soulfully rationalising a temporary romantic setback (i.e. "Love Hurts" echoes mournfully when Amanda rejects Preston's initial solicitation). Vignettes intersperse and splice with running gags, move on to one sphere of concern, flit to another, and then recycle through the conveyor belt of stock relationships.

But in this rapid-fire ensemble of quick little tales perfect for moviegoers with attention deficit disorder, the traditional emphasis inevitably returns to good old Preston (of the abiding-heartache) and his unrequited love, the comely Amanda. Neither Miss Hewitt nor Mr. Embry let loose any sparks in their suburban teen version of Cyrano, though they are adequate in establishing the broad cliché. More engaging is the second banana sub-plot involving sarcastic Denise and the ebonically eloquent Kenny, accidentally locked together in the upstairs bathroom for the duration. Mr. Green provides the movie's only original moments of humour. Miss Ambrose's self-imposed wallflower gives the film one of its few bits of real introspection.

But you can't even pretend to see the primal rantings of Can't Hardly Wait for any cerebral advantage. Just as you wouldn't choose Clarabelle to have a discussion about Kafka.

Home Page | Alphabetic Index | Ratings Index | Web Resources